Jharoka

My Mom’s room in my house is known as “Nano’s Room” and remains in tact the way she decorated it, filled it with her books and personal effects.

In her dresser, there are 9 drawers and each one has her signature personal effect – her tin boxes. Many Baby Boomers, my generation of Gen Xers and maybe some early Millenials can relate to coming across a seemingly misplaced tin of Royal Dansk Danish Butter Cookies, getting excited about the prospect of yummy cookies inside only to find a box filled with sewing paraphernalia. While my Mom has a couple of those boxes too, her tin boxes are like Russian nesting dolls.

In every drawer you open, you are guaranteed to find a large tin box and inside multiple others. It’s like the infamous infomercial “but wait, there’s more”! Her tin boxes were her unique way of organizing and compartmentalizing. Everything had it’s place. She saved everything that had the opportunity to be recycled or reused. She was very focused on reducing waste. If something broke or got damaged, they fixed it versus throwing it out and buying a new one. I think this was in the DNA of many of her generation and before, although this definitely wore off on me and I have a difficult time disposing of things that could be reused by me or someone else.

I don’t yet have the emotional strength to go through all of her things. I go into her room from time to time to get a whiff of her personal scent from the coat and shawl she wore the day she passed and then leave again, feeling both happy and sad.

I then begin down a long path of thought and contemplation – what is “life” all about. After traveling that thought path, I am mentally exhausted and still have no answer and so I pray. I pray for my Mom, my Dad, my sister, and sadly the long line of extended family members who have passed and I pray for patience, understanding, clarity, peace and the ability to manage my worldly affairs with less and less attachment and with more purpose. Some days I manage better than others – such is life.

If you have made it to this post / page, I would be most appreciative if you could say a prayer for my beloved parents and sister. Thank you.